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| That scene I swear I saw in WAR |
So, Aquaman is a dude named Arthur Curry. I figured that out quite some time ago. Why do you have to do this bullshit origin story. I don't remember liking Justice League: War, but I swear I remember the scene from the comic with Aquaman summoning a great white to kill one of Darkseid's minions. You know the ones that remind you of The Wonderful Wizard of OZ, and his flying monkies. Regardless of the fact that they're his minions [OZ], I really for the life of me while writing this can not remember the name of those bastards. Push it off! My mind has too much junk in it about comic book shit to begin with, and this probably gives you ample time to write in the comments how much of a dithering twat I am. Like I said fuck that, let's move on.
It's no surprise that I don't remember much from subtitle WAR, it was a shitty direct to DVD animated movie. Oh wait all of these are. However Throne of Atlantis seems to take the proverbial cake with this one, and I wouldn't have minded seeing this in theaters. If I had the cash for it that is. Jesus I'm rambling again, aren't I? Fuck this, let's get to the review!
So let's talk about the plot holes, or the parts of movie as an AM (AquaMan) nerd I didn't really get. First of all we have Orm, he's the young son of Atlanna, and the former king, also Arthur's half brother. He should be a lock-in for the next to throne right? Nah Arthur is older and a bastard, and if we know anything from 'Song of Ice and Fire' books, bastards go a long way in legitimacy. Look at that Roose Bolton asshole! Point aside, why is this guy hanging out with Black Manta? I mean he's a known surface dweller and dick. But Atlanna's like, "it's cool you're making friends Orm, none of which will be there for my downfall as a queen". Are you fucking kidding me?! This guy is a surface dweller, the same problem you have with and thus want diplomacy with. Fuck your son ask this guy questions! Atlanna is an idiot, and trust me this isn't her first fuck up.
So on the other side of the dais we have Arthur and his dad with plot holes. Oh son, don't get to close to the waters on that there rocks. I know you're half-atlantean, but for fucks sake don't drown. OH, wait you saw someone who looked like your mother requesting you to the waters? She kissed you on the forehead and gave you knowledge that she was your mother?! BALDERDASH! Seriously it's one of the dumbest moments in the movie, and inconsequential aside the fact of we see Arthur's dad doing dad things. Almost unnecessary, if it weren't the fact that we needed reaffirmation that Arthur is Atlanna's son for stupid people.
Moving right along with the plot holes, I'm tempted to say wholes, because it really makes up the back story for Aquaman. No wonder people hate this asshole without knowing his true story. Let's tell it in a sort of way where it feels shoved down our throats, right? So there is a scene halfway through the movie where Orm just straight up kills his mother. Why?, Because plot, and he's unhappy with her idea of peace with the surface. Which is to meet up with the bros and broettes of the Justice League. Seriously, she doesn't want to go to the UN, she rather preach to the the Justice League. I mean I get it, they're the strongest people on the planet and after their garbage in WAR, they're capital. It's a somewhat strong plan. This pushes a subplot that should've been picked up on by the writers, but fuck it right? Hey, this world leader of supposedly 75% of the globe, and wants to talk with those 7 billion people, where the JL at?
Fuck all that though this asshole shanks his mother in the back with a weirdly crooked knife. Which goes into my next plot hole, but stays with my last. I mean I really want to talk about matricide for a bit, but I can't when you got it blaring from the enemy across the battlefield. This somehow stops the warriors of Atlantis from fighting and dropping the most important gear they have, their helmets. Seriously we're given scenes with tanks and National Guard rolling around, and these dumbasses take their helmets off. Literally after Wonder Womans chops to the head with her swords. It's all because Cyborg decides to broadcast the event where Orm goes full crazy and says he killed his mother because he wanted war with the surface, and anyone who was against him was crazy.
Let's talk about the differences between the comic and the movie! Seriously I may be confused about Arthur's involvement with WAR, but regardless it is hilarious to look at this from the actual comic it was birthed from. For one, that tidal wave heading for the East coast, Metropolis and Gotham involved... well it actually hit. It wasn't just a front and then Moses Spread attack by Orm. I really don't know what the director of the movie was going for, It's not like you're going to world build better than a monthly comic! Let that shit hit the coast, you've got heroes like Batman submerged... OH, that's why, isn't it? Batman can't really fight underwater unless he had some combat ready sub, oh you guys missed out on the toy opportunities!
Let's go back to the focal point with Arthur. So this guy in the comics was already an established member of the Justice League. Not to mention he was incumbent king of Atlantis. So it was kind of fucked up his brother launched an attack against the East coast like he did. It was a back and forth between the the JL and AM. Was he on their side or was he on the new Atlantean's side? That's good story-telling right there, and I have to applaud Geoff Johns, who was writing both on-goings at the time. He knew what he wanted and ran with it, damn the consequences. Seriously when I was reading the books I loved Throne of Atlantis by Johns and Ivan Reis. Shit was good. Art was amazing, but this doesn't hold a candle to it.
So, Kyle what is good about this fucking movie? Why would to buy a ticket with your low-income to see it? Simple; it felt like a Justice League movie. Maybe better than what WB is trying to pump out with their live-action shit. I love Man of Steel, and I'll probably love Batman vs. Superman. But when it comes down to it, It really is hard to portray the characters of the DC universe in live action. I've become aware of that and most people have to. And I think it's only going to get more apparent as we move along in live-action film. I could be wrong, I love practical effects in my films, but that's slowly dying off with these big blockbusters such as the Avengers. CG is the norm, and it looks so good too. I'm sad but I'm finding acceptance towards those developments. But, and it's a big BUTT. Holy shit is the animation quality present with Throne of Atlantis. I mean It's near good budget levels of Young Justice! I really feel like this is the core of the the film. It gets some new ideas weather they're right or wrong in the grand scheme of things, they make a whole. A whole and great movie I enjoyed watching. Much more than WAR, seriously that movie was dumb all around. I understand it was to set up for this movie, but at least they got one thing right. Nathan Fillion for Hal Jordan, all day fucking long! Seriously cast him in the live action movie!
In general I give the movie a 7 out of 10. It's not great because of the plot holes, but I understand what they're attempting. Overall it was fun, and I love fun movies!
